im realizing that there is a new life for me at home. one that i dont feel like i know or understand. a new home in fact. new home new people new work environment new chapter in many many ways. i dont know what its going to be like without that person. i feel relieved in some ways. but i also feel scared and cynical and angry and hurt and sad and bitter and worried and wanting to make sure things are ok but it really isnt my place. i would like to stop caring but i dont work that way. this new section of my life is going to be beautiful and worth it and happy and successful, i juss feel like its waiting to get started, and it cant yet. i feel like im waiting in the airport. more than ever. ...wondering whos at the arrivals gate.

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-heres answers to the questions-

what is something that you've recently learned? to live the way that i need to live and not allow other peoples plans and wishes to determine who/where/what/why i am

what would be your dream vacation? it would be with my family and about 5 or 6 of my favorite people in my life, we would road trip in a big bus to various places and then fly to uganda to they could all see my kids that i volunteer with. then we would cruise back home, stopping in italy and the british isles.

and...what are your major pet peeves? when you get food from  a fast food place and someone puts the wrapper to their eaten burger (or whatever else it may be) in the bag when theres still fries or something else you plan to eat in it.     and being told to calm down or kick back or chill when im not even upset or excited.      and codependency.

how do you like nashville? i like it. its smaller and less obnoxious than i expected. i dont understand the weather at all. but i like it. the fireflies are my favorite part.

what is your favorite beverage? either Jones' bada bing cherry or chocolate milk with whipped cream.

and what is your strongest memory? [not necessarily the best or worst just the one that 'sticks out' the most] staying in this big log cabin in mississippi with my parents, sister and some of our relatives. i remember my grampa (who is now passed away) was sitting in this big chair and i was sitting on the ground and looking up at him wishing that i could know him and who he was before hed gotten old. i was like 6 i think. and my other main memory is being in the same grampas apt with my family and he always had circus peanuts or big jelly beans on his coffee table and lydia and i would ask if we could use his binoculars to look at the big view out his window and hed always say "i dont know, can you?" and its funny that both my main memories are with him cos i didnt really know him very well at all.

1) Are you having a good time on your mini break? yes i LOVE being with my sister and seeing sara and don and ya, i am having a good time.

2) What is your fondest memory (childhood or adult--you can pick)? well both of the afore mentioned memories prolly. and then id have to say lass week when i spent all day in mybackyard with my violet and mike and tuppy. that was really a beautiful day.

3) If you could have anything in the world what would you have? non material-to know that i am doing/being exactly what/where im spozed to be doing/ being. material-a car with a sunroof and windows that roll up and down the way theyre spozed to and automatic locks. oh ya, and a working ac in it too. *one day*

1. IF you drink what is your fave alcoholic bev? i dont drink, i really hate alcohol actually. BUT the only drink that i did like was called bucks fizz, i had it in england.

2. who is your fave care bear OR care bear cousin? i dont know any names or anything but id have to say the blue one. no real reason why though. i juss like blue.

3. do you believe in God? yes, very much so.

1. would you rather sky dive or ride in a hot air balloon? sky dive but im a wuss so id prolly pick the balloon

2. if you could legally and respectfully domesticate (not even domesticate (because i don't like that word or the negative stigma attached to it)... like you could totally give it an area EXACTLY like it's natural habitat) OKAY NEVERMIND I'M CUTTING THIS ONE OFF AND MAKING IT SIMPLE........ what is your favorite animal?! haha....i laughed. ummm an elephant. i love elephants.

3.  have you been impressed by anyone or anything in the last three days?... if so, what or who or just explain! ive been impressed by the weather here. its so stinking hot and yet it manages to rain! this is foreign to me. specially cos it rains hard and big. more rain than we get where i live in a whole year. its really rather amazing. ive been impressed by more important things too...